I admit that laziness would prevail if I attempted to throw myself an actual birthday celebration but I’m no robot. I have emotions and if you prick me, I shall bleed. I crave for attention but I have accepted my failings at essential hosting tasks like researching gazebo rental times, providing accurate directions to destinations and mopping up from keg stands. Instead, I’m capitalizing on my strengths of nonsense writing and temporary enthusiasm to fabricate an internet spectacular!
Besides this great idea minimizing effort, holding an intangible fiesta allows freedom to invite everyone. Online profiles of family members, business colleagues and people who increase blog count can all mingle together in internet harmony. If you have “concrete” plans December 17th, dwell in a different hemisphere or exist solely in the cyber world, you still can join.
The beauty of this is it being low maintenance all around. I just want invitees to press “attend” so I’m convinced that if I planned a physical party, thousands of guests would show. You get to omit all future party obligations such as worrying I may win the lottery scratch offs you bought me, dancing the electric slide and putting on pants. Its win win as responders get credit for bringing me joy by merely lifting a finger and I safely assume that I’m still popular and handsome.
Alright, let me wrap this up. I believe reading is a chore so it would be hypocritical of me if this got too lengthy. Thank you in advance and I am looking forward to hypothetically drinking a beer with you!
PS I’ve titled the picture “Cake in outer space on office loose leaf notebook canvas”
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